Good morning Lovelies, how’s your week been?
Sorry for the delay in posting this week’s #SFFSeries… tis been a really crazy week here so I wasn’t able to put necessary finishing touches on it yesterday but tada, It’s here now! I pray it encourages, inspires and blesses your heart.
Our Star Guest for today’s episode of the SFF Series is Joshua Alade, the Multiple Award Winner and Community Evangelist of NextGen Africa Initiative, an organisation that builds the soft skills of disadvantaged youngsters to steer them towards fulfilling their potential. Joshua is also the convener of the annual Dare To Dream Conference. He is passionate about young people and their ideas and he’s been really helpful in making the SFF Series a reality.
Today, he shares with us his thoughts on how possible it is for a Single to be fruitful and fulfilled. (Single in this context means an unmarried young man/woman who is neither a baby mama nor baby papa). Please seat back, read, learn and share your thoughts/lessons in the comments box.
Being Single Means Having Maximum Time To Serve God And Humanity – Joshua Alade
SFF Question: Can we meet you please?
Joshua: My name is Joshua Alade, I am the Community Evangelist of NextGen Africa Initiative, an organisation that builds the soft skills of disadvantaged youngsters to steer them towards fulfilling their potential. I enjoy teaching, having intelligent conversation around social change, sustainability and fulfilling God’s purpose for life.
SFF Question: What does being single mean to you?
Joshua: For me, being single means having maximum time to serve God and humanity with passion. It is about discovering myself every day and doing the things I love with the people I care about. It is about being spontaneous, loving my life and at the same time being accountable.
SFF Question: Can a single be fruitful and fulfilled?
Joshua: Yes, a single can be fruitful and fulfilled. Being fruitful and fulfilled is all about the mind. Being single gives you the opportunity to chase the things you care about, it helps you to get your fingers burnt, throw caution to the wind sometimes, especially when it comes to things you care about. It is a beautiful time to serve God, humanity and chase your passion with little or no distraction..
SFF Question: At what point did it dawn on you that one can be fruitful and fulfilled even before getting married?
Joshua: I have had this consciousness since I was in JSS One. My role models have always been Joshua Nun and Paul of Tarsus (from the bible), two amazing young people who served God with everything they had in them. Being single is an opportunity for me to have more time for my purpose and serve God passionately. Who knows if I get married if I will be able to change the TV channel? Lol
SFF Question: How important is it to discover purpose and have a vision before getting married?
Joshua: Very important! Discovering purpose while single helps you to put things in the right perspective and also influences your choice of a life partner. Going into marriage without an understanding of purpose, is like a ship captain moving into sea without a rudder, a sense of direction. When you discover purpose, you will have an understanding of what your life work is and vision helps you to amplify your purpose as you have an understanding of every season of your life.
SFF Question: Did you have any wedding plans for 2016? Or desire to get married before end of 2016?
Joshua: No, I didn’t have any desire to get married in 2016. I am on a journey of becoming. I am discovering myself every day and it has been fun all the way. I made new friends and I went out more often with different people.
SFF Question: What can a single do to become SFF?
Joshua: Embrace your singleness. Find out why God has sent you here on earth and pursue it with passion. Don’t compare yourself with anyone as we are all on a different stage of becoming and don’t forget that God is not interested in what you have achieved but what you are becoming.
SFF Question: How can one differentiate between the desire and the desperation to be married?
Joshua: This is a beautiful one. Desire to get married should come from one identifying the role of the other person in his/her future and the willingness, especially on the part of the male to take responsibility for whatever happens in the relationship. Desire for marriage should spring out of love to complement each other and fulfill God’s purpose in each other’s lives.
Desperation on the other hand is borne out of a shallow motive, societal or family pressure and most times the biological clock. Desperation to get married focuses first on self before thinking of the other person.
SFF Question: What are the challenges you have faced on the journey to be SFF?
Joshua: Interestingly I have faced pressure from friends and loved ones. Sometimes you hear people say, “how can you be a public speaker cum thought leader if you don’t have a woman whom you are in a relationship with that you leading?”
SFF Question: Advice to anyone who think it is impossible to be SFF?
Joshua: Seek clarity first and ask God to make you understand your purpose in life. Follow it with passion. Understanding your life work will help you maximize your singleness and identify friends that will help you along the way. You can be single and satisfied!
SFF Bonus Question: What part of your lifestyle do you think will likely change after marriage?
Joshua: Errrmmm. I will say none. Though I am of ‘age’ to get married, I think there’s still so much to do now that I am single before marriage. I want to change the world around me, if I get married, it may not be that easy to change even the TV station, lol.
Boom! Joshua gave it to us short and direct, I particularly love the way he summed it up – You can be single and satisfied! Say that to yourself when them pressures try to build up.
Thank you so much Sire for taking out time to answer these #SFF FAQs. One outstanding lesson this reiterates for me is that Desire for marriage should spring out of love to complement my future spouse and ultimately fulfill God’s purpose in each other’s lives… Desperation for marriage focuses first on self before thinking of the other person (boi, i have been here!).
Your turn sweeties, what lessons did you pick from Joshua’s interview? Please share in the comment box let’s learn together.
Next Star Guest on the #SFF Series is Princess Anne Atulegwu, CEO & Founder at The BIRTH PLACE. Please keep a date with us next Thursday.
PS: For the benefit of those asking, The SFF Series (Single, Fruitful and Fulfilled Series) does not in any way negate or undermine the institution of marriage. Contrary to that, it tries to buttress that you have to be fruitful first as a single before you can be fruitful as anyone’s companion.
Y’all rock! Thanks for staying tuned to the end.